Who Needs Sleep?

18 Weeks, 2 Days

For the last several months I have been falling asleep at 8:30 every evening. Griffin and I watch a DVD at night and when 8:30 comes I keel over, my eyes won't stay open and I eventually give up and say good-night. Today is my last day of Christmas break. 12 days of sleeping in and staying up "late". Last night we went to bed at 11! That is seriously late for me. I wasn't even falling asleep on the couch.

Of course, once I got into bed I couldn't fall asleep. So, as is my usual routine, I played a postcast on my iPhone. I set the timer to shut off in 58 minutes. I listened to the postcast for a while and drifted in and out. Griffin was asleep within 5 minutes. Lucky bastard. He rarely has trouble sleeping once he is in bed.

I realized that the room was silent and an hour must have passed. I dozed, but couldn't get into my sleep groove. I laid there thinking sleepily. This meant trouble.

When I wake up in the morning, my feet often hurt. Its really bad sometimes; I actually limp down the stairs until they stretch out. As I was lying awake in bed I noticed the way I was positioned: curled on my side, one leg higher than the other, one ankle resting in the arch of the foot on the other side. My foot started to ache, so I moved my legs.

Had I been sleeping like this all along? I am a 'side sleeper', and apparently I am a foot crusher as well. No wonder my feet hurt so bad in the morning. It was an amazing conclusion and I was happy to solve the mystery. Of course, now armed with this knowledge, how was I going to keep my foot and ankle away from each other?

As I lay there contemplating this I noticed they already crawled back together and my foot was aching again. Sadistic ankle! Stay away from that poor foot! I flipped over and it was payback time. The opposite foot and ankle connected without me even realizing it. I was thinking about getting a pregnancy pillow and before I knew what was happening, they were connected and my other foot was hurting.

I rolled onto my stomach and noticed that I could feel my melon-sized uterus below me. It was like laying on a small soccer ball. I rearranged my pillows, I always sleep with two, and I tried to get half on my side, half on my stomach without crushing the offspring and without letting my foot and ankle get together. I was uncomfortable.

This is going to only get worse for the next 5 months? I started to doze. One of our cats yowled on the first floor. It was Jack.

In September he had been attacked by something outside and came home with eight or nine bite wounds on his leg. After a long night at the emergency vet, I was guilted into keeping him in the house. That lasted all of two months. He yowled every night and every day. It was pitiful. We couldn't take it anymore and let him go out again. He can leave the house through the doggie-door in the basement. Very convenient.

His yowling last night was the same sound he made when he wanted to go out. Its a wounded, painful sound. I wondered if the basement door was closed, so he couldn't get out. Worse yet, I wondered if the basement door was closed so he couldn't use the litter box. I thought maybe he was outside and got attacked by something again. Maybe he was suffering from bladder stones again like he had when he was three. Maybe there was someone on the first floor sneaking around and he was trying to warn us. Maybe there were dark forces in the house planning to attack us in our sleep (We had watched Paranormal Activity the night before). Maybe that cat just needed to shut up. And he did. But I still didn't sleep.

I was now so tired that I wasn't sure that I was still awake. Perhaps I was asleep and dreaming about being awake. This troubled me. How could I be sure if I was awake or sleeping? It seemed to really matter to me. So I thought about things that I didn't think I would think about when I was sleeping. When I realized I was doing this, I thought that it was so crazy I must be sleeping, but I wasn't really sure.

I did sleep for a while and had a weird dream. I became sweaty and itchy. When the light started to creep into our room, I realized I was awake again. I felt like I hadn't slept at all. At least I was a trooper and stayed in bed. My body got some rest, even if my mind didn't.

Tomorrow I go back to work. Tonight should be fun.